A Friend Like Me

A lot of times, when a person goes to make a friend, they often try to find someone who is just like them. And of course, this is an important part of being friends. You want to be sure that your friends have the same ideas as you do. You want them to feel the same way as you do about certain things. You also want to be sure that your friends enjoy doing the same things that you do.

Having common bonds with your friends is very important, because this means that you have things to do with them and things to talk about.

On the other hand, if you spend all of your time looking for a "friend like me", you might miss out on excellent friendships that you would otherwise not have noticed. Now, it may not be wise to go about making friends with someone who is so completely different from you that they make you uncomfortable. Seriously, you don't want to go so far out of your comfort zone that you have nothing in common. It's just that sometimes you can enjoy spending time with someone who makes you think differently or try new things.

Lizzy's Story

Lizzy's story: It was her sophomore year in high school and Lizzy was struggling to keep her grades up. She was a good student, ordinarily, but lately, she didn't seem to care about school. Her parents were getting a divorce and she was having a hard time coming to terms with it. She was angry and she was hurt. All of her "old" friends didn't understand how she felt as their parents were still married. Lizzy decided she needed to find a friend like her in order to share her feelings. The problem was, how was she supposed to go about it?

After a few months of intense loneliness and deepening depression, Lizzy found herself feeling like her world was spiraling out of control. She decided, out of desperation, to get together with a group of students who met on Friday mornings at the school to pray. While Lizzy wasn't especially religious, she figured it wouldn't hurt. As it turned out, the first person Lizzy met was a guy named Brad whose own parents divorced just a year earlier. He understood her feelings of anger and didn't make her feel bad about feeling that way. It took a long time for Lizzy to make some sense of her feelings, but by having a friend who understood her, she had someone who could help her through it.

When you say you'd like "a friend like me", make sure that you know what that means. Do you really want a friend who is exactly like you in every single way, or do you want a friend who is similar to you in only some ways? Sometimes, what you think you want and what you really need are two different things. Perhaps your new best friend and you only have one thing in common. Spend some time thinking about the kind of attributes you want in your friend. Is it the fact that she is also in band class and you'd like a friend there? Or is it that he's in the same sport as you? Do you want someone who has the same common beliefs as you, or that has the same sense of humor as you, or who is into the same things as you are?

When you start recognize what you want and need in a friendship, you can be much more successful in searching for friends who can meet those needs.

After you have decided what type of friends you are looking for, you have to be willing to find them, interact with them and nourish those relationships. If you want friends who enjoy the same things that you do, you have to be willing to reach out to people who go to the same places as you or who participate in the same things that you do. You also have to be willing to reach out to those that have the same outlook on life that you do. However, always remember that when it comes to finding "friends like me" you want to be careful. Don't shy away from someone who could be a great friend just because they aren't exactly like you.